It’s been a confusing time for me. I’m often melancholic but I attempt to balance that out with hopefulness. It’s hard. When you’ve been at a low point it’s hard to find the strength or be optimistic. Where do you even start? Sometimes it’s as simple as finding the light in small things and being content with that.
This post was inspired by Mos Def – Umi Says and a friend
If you read my last post, I’m glad you’re back with me. I got a pretty dark but it felt like a story I needed to share. I’ve kept it bottled up for so long that it felt liberating just to talk about it. I just needed to let it out and give those feelings space. I’m admittedly not good at that and as a man, I was never really taught it’s ok to do so. It’s healthy to allow feelings, even pain and disappointment, to exist. We should own our feelings and experiences. You don’t have to bury them out of fear some may judge you.
I’m an introvert so I don’t share who I am with everybody. No one shares every part of themselves with anyone really. We’re taught to wear masks at an early age to be accepted. There are so many things we do on a regular basis to conform we start lying to ourselves. We forget who we really are and what we really want.
It gets to the point where we’re not only hiding our fears, pain, and anger. We also start to hide our joys, aspirations, and beliefs. All things we share without even thinking in infancy but at some point, you learn being an adult means humbling yourself and accepting your limitations. That’s true but it’s a lesson that can be adhered to too rigidly.
See, the light we’re often looking for in hard times is right inside of us but we’ve been hiding it for so long we forgot it was there. You just have to reignite it and let it out. I’ve been trying to do that through my art and writing. I’ve also been more willing simply express myself or stand up for my beliefs.
It’s not just important to do for yourself. Just as you need someone sometimes, it’s easy to forget others need your light in their lives too. We all feed off each other’s energy. If someone is a light in your life make sure to take the time to try to reciprocate that. Your friends, family, and even complete strangers need you to share your energy with them.
Our egos often get in the way of giving or giving back. It’s hard to ignore the urge to think about what we’ll get in return. It won’t always appear advantageous but attempting to help someone or just sharing kind words can be gratifying. I’ve caught myself trying to be a good friend and getting upset when I felt they weren’t trying to do the same for me. If I’m being honest with myself though, I have been oblivious or inconsiderate at times as well.
I’m certainly not infallible but I’m learning. As such the message I want to impart today is to shine. Shine out in everything you do. Be a beacon for others in dark times like Severus’ Patronus Charm. Share your gifts with the world. No matter what they may be or who appreciates it, excel at it. Shine like Domon Kashhu’s fingers. Shine like a Genki Dama above Goku’s outstretched hands. Just shine. It may not seem to help immediately but you’ll be better for it.
Thanks for reading. As always feel free to leave a comment and below.